We just finished our webinar on finding and preparing sponsors and godparents (Team Initiation members can view the recording here), and I’ve been reflecting on the experience.
We can do all the planning, preparing, training, and strategizing we want—but at the end of the day, the Holy Spirit is running things.
Right now, our parish has a seeker I’ll call Hildegard. She was raised in the Jehovah’s Witness tradition but never baptized. Shortly after meeting her, I took her to a Knights of Peter Claver pancake breakfast and introduced her to some parishioners. She immediately connected with a woman I’ll call Abigale. They talked for nearly an hour, long after the breakfast was over and chairs were being stacked away. I prayed a quick “thank you” to the Holy Spirit—Abigale would be the perfect sponsor.
The next day, when I asked, Abigale was honored but declined. She was leaving for six months abroad.
I prayed again, asked around, and kept coming back to another parishioner, Janice. She wasn’t the perfect sponsor, but she was faithful, thoughtful, and grounded. Janice too was honored but turned me down. She had knee surgery coming up, and just too much “life” going on right now.
The perfect “no”
Meanwhile, the Holy Spirit provided sponsors for two other seekers, no problem. One sponsor said “yes” even before I could finish asking for help. But for Hildegard, weeks passed without a sponsor.
Then one Sunday, Hildegard’s growing curiosity about the Rosary led me to introduce her to Betsy, our parish’s “Rosary Queen.” Another hour-long conversation bloomed, and I thought we finally had it. But Betsy too turned me down. This time, though, I felt an unexpected calm. I told Betsy her “no” was okay—God must have someone else in mind. Saying those words out loud helped me believe them.
An unexpected yes
The following week, after Mass, I saw Carmen talking with our choir director. I hadn’t considered her—she often has grandchildren in tow, and she isn’t at Mass every Sunday. I wasn’t sure she’d have the time needed to give to Hildegard.
When I asked, she carefully explained her boundaries and reluctance to overcommit. I braced for another “no.” Then she asked who the seeker was.
“Hildegard?!” she exclaimed. “I already know her! I’m a definite yes!”
My heart almost burst with joy at how joyful Carmen was. Once again, I was reminded that the Spirit never works on my schedule—but always acts.
What I have to remember for next time is simply to keep showing up, making introductions, asking questions, and then letting go. The Spirit takes care of the rest.
What I learned
Here are some lessons I learned — or relearned — in all this.
- The Holy Spirit is in charge, not us. We’re called to do the legwork, but God makes the match.
- A “no” is not a failure. Every “no” clears the way for the right “yes.”
- Sponsors don’t need to be “perfect.” God works through the gifts and limits of ordinary parishioners.
- Patience is part of the process. The Spirit works in God’s time, not ours.
- The seeker’s journey is shaped by relationships of accompaniment. The right sponsor is someone who already shares life and faith, not just someone filling a role.
- Our job is to trust. God’s plan often unfolds in surprising ways.
Finding Hildegard’s sponsor wasn’t up to me. I keep making that mistake. God already had a companion for her. My job was to wait on the Spirit to weave relationships in ways I could never have orchestrated. What I have to remember for next time is simply to keep showing up, making introductions, asking questions, and then letting go. The Spirit takes care of the rest.
What about you?
Have you ever had a moment where the Spirit surprised you in finding the right sponsor, godparent, or mentor? Share your story in the comments. I’d love to hear how God has worked in your parish.
